My wife and I have been married four-and-a-half years, and we both are bi. We’ve been propositioned by–and played with–a number of sexy friends heteroflexible enough not to want or need full swap. So our play with others has been limited to oral and light petting.
Sure, SC, but the first bit of advice I wanna give you is rhetorical. Only pre-Vatican II nuns and modern Mormon virgins use the phrase “light petting.” People are going to have a hard time taking you seriously as swingers–hell, they’re going to have a hard time taking you seriously as nonvirgins–if you insist on saying “light petting” instead of “mutual masturbation” or “manual stimulation.”
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If after agreeing to a night of oral and manual this other guy verbally suggests upgrading to full swap midscene, well, he gets an F. If he physically attempts to upgrade to the full hetero by initiating vaginal intercourse he gets an F-.
I’ve been mistaken for that kind of fantasy archetype more times than I care to recall (although I can’t for the life of me figure out why), and I’m sure this is exactly how FOG thought of her unfortunate ex. He probably didn’t tell her about his kink sooner because, deep down, he sensed that she would react exactly the way she did. As far as I’m concerned, Dan, you can’t point this out often enough: the conventional idea of what constitutes a “normal” man is absolutely 100 percent nonexistent. Please keep spreading the word. –Real Love Is Weird
