Any words of wisdom on girlfriends, boyfriends, and spouses who claim to be GGG but systematically take away much of what they give by making it clear that they are not “into it” even as they fulfill their lovers’ fantasies?
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I strive to be fair and balanced, WHIPME, but lately some Savage Love readers have accused me–me!–of gender discrimination. It’s no coincidence that I tend to come down on the profetish and pro-fantasy-realization side in most disputes, my critics contend–because men are likelier to be fetishists. I’m just another voice out there telling women there’s something wrong with them if they don’t cater to a man’s every whim.
But to prove that my prokink, profetish, pro-fantasy-realization stance has nothing to do with my dick, I’ve asked Midori–famous sex educator, author, feminist, and full-fledged, lifelong female–to grab the Savage Love reins for a week.
I’m a straight, relatively kinky 26-year-old male. I met a woman I’m crazy about. However, she’s opened up to me and told me that a man raped her when she was a teenager. She says she still has trouble dealing with this. What struck me as odd was that she told me this after the millionth time she asked me to “rape” her, tie her up, hold her down, call her foul names, etc. I thought I was helping the woman of my dreams get off, but now I feel a little weird. Does she have this fetish as the result of being raped? Is there a sensitive way to bring this up with her? –Suddenly Reluctant “Rapist”
Oh, and an observation from me, BITE: You say bestiality is wrong because “no person should ever force an animal to do anything.” Um, what about women? Unlike mainstream porn, almost all of the women who appear in bestiality porn were forced into it. A little less concern for dogs and a little more for women might help you work through this.
