I’m a 34-year-old woman. I recently became reacquainted with a boyfriend from college, and we e-mail each other daily. He lives in Alaska, and I live on the east coast. We hadn’t seen each other since 1993, but we’d carried on a snail-mail and e-mail correspondence on and off for all those years. I always ended it, usually because of my being involved with other men, but he’d pursue it again several months later and I would cave. Anyway, college boy and I decided it was time to see each other again and got together for five days in New Orleans. We had fabulous sex every night and enjoyed each other’s company all day. Then we parted ways again.
Best of Chicago voting is live now. Vote for your favorites »
A few days later I called him and told him I loved him. He said it wasn’t reciprocated. However, he continues to write me daily. He tells me he thinks I’m beautiful, sexy, smart, funny, etc. For a guy who’s not interested he sends some very mixed signals. He claims he was never in love with me, though, and doesn’t think he’ll ever love anyone romantically. Oh yeah–the last person he had sex with before me in New Orleans was me in college. He hadn’t had sex in 12 years! He lives in Alaska and spends six to eight months of the year doing remote jobs where he usually works with all-male crews or alone. He’s a very rugged, tough, solitary man’s man (and sooooooo sexy). He often asks me to call him and sends me little packages of CDs and DVDs. What do I make of this? He’s already said he’s terrified of my showing up in Alaska and thinks I’m too into him, but then he turns around and tells me there’s nothing wrong with me and he thinks I’m awesome. –One Confused Chickie
Here’s what I suspect is going on: this woman knows how you feel and smiles and nods when you steer the conversation in a flirtatious direction. Why? Because you’re her husband’s friend and she doesn’t want to embarrass you by telling you that she would rather eat her own shit than fuck your vibin’ ass. To spare you the humiliation of hearing those three magic words (“not gonna happen”), LOSER, she lets you flirt. If you were to make the mistake of explicitly hitting on her I promise you she wouldn’t endure you any longer–nor would her husband. Find another girl.
Does A know about B? Does B know about A? These two details are conspicuously absent from your letter, HOW. If the two hot women know about each other and it’s an established fact that they don’t mind sharing you, well then they might be up for a three-way. But if they don’t, well then we’ve got our third case of WTS in this week’s mailbag. If both of these hot women assume they’re the one and only person you’re seeing at the moment, HOW, letting them know about each other’s existence in the form of a request for a three-way could have disastrous consequences. You could wind up going back in time and showing your 16-year-old self pictures of the hot women you had and lost.
