I’m a 22-year-old female with a wonderful, caring 21-year-old boyfriend. While I’ve slept with more people than he has, none of my long-term relationships has lasted as long as his single previous relationship (we’ve been dating for nine months). I felt very grounded and secure in our relationship, and was ready to try new things with him–until yesterday.
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Ask yourself this, BI: If your boyfriend had said, “Oh, yeah, I did anal with the ex–I fucked her ass tons of times!” during that early “experience level” conversation, wouldn’t it have made him seem a tad sexually intimidating? And wouldn’t knowing that he had already done anal with his ex make you feel like you had to do it too–and do it soon–to keep his interest? And wouldn’t that have made you feel pressured to do anal before you were ready?
Instead of rubbing his anal experiences in your face, as it were, he let you get to know him first. He let you see that he was wonderful and caring, safe and patient, and then gave you the, er, whole story. Was he deceitful? I suppose so, but early “experience level” conversations aren’t depositions–Christ, if they were we would all be perjurers. Sometimes trust has to be built and trustworthiness demonstrated before someone feels secure enough to reveal everything.
She wants to have FFM three-ways because she’s attracted to women, FIF, but there’s something in it for you too. Not only do you get to participate, but your participation also gives you veto power over the women your girlfriend messes around with. But if you sleep with other women without her around, she doesn’t get a veto.
Straight Rights Update: Every time I write one of these I think, “This is the last one. Banning abortion, evicting unmarried straight couples and their children, moving to ban birth control–things can’t get any worse, can they?”
There is a bright side to the CDC’s announcement: If we’re going to regard all females as prepregnant, then we can, as my friend Gomez points out, regard all virgins as merely prefucked.
