My boyfriend, Jason, is having problems with a boy named Roger who’s obsessed with him. But because Roger is friends with Jason and Jason’s friends, Jason won’t just tell him off. Roger had the audacity to call Jason today and ask about our sex life. Roger is not only making Jason’s life hell, he’s also making their shared friends’ lives hell. On top of it all, Roger called Jason’s ex, Cody, and told him about me being around the dorm, which may sound petty, but Cody is a very sweet boy who doesn’t need Roger making him feel like shit because of the fact that Jason’s dating someone new.
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Your letter really took me back, RMF. When I was a freshman in college and dating Ricky, a sophomore, I was also fucking Randy, a senior, at the same time. Randy knew about Ricky, but Ricky didn’t know about Randy. The fact that Randy had another boyfriend, a grad student also named Ricky, didn’t really bother me because I was cheating too, you know? So everything was cool and I was getting laid like crazy. But then my Ricky found out about Randy and Randy’s Ricky found out about me and we were all convinced that the world was coming to an end. We were wrong. The sun kept coming up, RMF, and we quickly realized that we were just a bunch of silly faggots with too much time on our hands and too much cock in our mouths.
Which brings me to you and Jason and Roger and Cody. Your desire to make Roger the villain in this little drama is understandable. You’re dating Jason, and you don’t want to think ill of him. But Jason is the problem here, RMF, not Roger. While Roger sounds like a deluded asshole, it’s Jason’s reluctance to tell Roger to fuck off that’s keeping this drama alive. Roger is creepy and obsessed and he makes Jason’s current boyfriend and ex-boyfriend uncomfortable–so why exactly does Jason maintain a friendship with Roger? Because Jason enjoys being the lead in the Jason/RMF/Roger/Cody show, just as I enjoyed being the lead of the Danny/Ricky/Ricky/Randy show.
The thought of a 53-year-old talking to a minor about masturbation is creepy enough, but it’s even creepier when they’re related and the minor is very close to not being a minor anymore. At 17 there’s nothing this kid needs to learn about the subject–and certainly nothing that his funny uncle needs to share. –Perturbed About Uncle’s Lechery
