My boyfriend and I have been together for a little over four years. I love him more than I thought possible.
A few weeks ago I met a guy that I think is amazingly shiny–and I slept with him. My boyfriend encouraged me to enjoy myself, so I did. But now it’s eating at him. He makes little needling comments about my leaving him for the new lover. I’ve tried to reassure him that I love him and want to share my life with him, but it hasn’t seemed to help.
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At first I felt bad for sleeping with someone else, since it obviously bothered him so much, but the longer this goes on, the more irked I’m getting. The new lover isn’t interested in a relationship with me, and I’m not interested in a relationship with him. But I’ve caught nothing but hell over this, and I’m getting a little fed up. We’ve always been very open and honest with each other–at least I have, anyway. Should I ask him to tell me what, exactly, is bothering him about this whole situation? Or should I just bite my tongue and not sleep with other men? –Irked by Double Standard
So what do you do?
So Dan, should she force herself to do something that was forced upon her when she younger? Should she force herself to get over what happened? –Won’t Dump Her for Head
Your boyfriend knows exactly what he’s doing, WAA–he’s testing you. The first time he acted like a five-year-old you didn’t say anything because it was pretty weird. And he’s so handsome and nice. And you didn’t want to make him feel bad. And you hoped it wouldn’t happen again. But then he did it again. And you still didn’t say anything. And then he did it again. And again and again and again. And you never objected. And the five-year-old act is hurting your relationship, but your boyfriend doesn’t know that. Instead he’s thinking, hey, I hit the fucking jackpot–I met a guy who enjoys this five-year-old role-play stuff just as much as I do.
