Here’s my problem. I got fired from my job at the beginning of the summer and, long story short, ended up escorting to pay the bills. Being a call boy in New York turned out to be not nearly as bad as I expected. In fact, it was fun. I was safe (used condoms, worked through a Web listing, always let someone know where I was), the work was easy, I met fascinating people and made a lot of money. I had a great summer.
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That his boyfriend is putting himself through school by having sex for money is just the sort of thing that any sweet, sane boy (SSB) would feel he has a right to know before things get serious. Hell, he has a right to know before things get sexual. Even if he doesn’t have a problem with sex work morally, he’ll resent the fact that you kept it from him on principle, which is to say the cover-up may be worse than the crime.
Don’t get me wrong, PNLT: I don’t think there’s anything immoral about prostitution. I have friends who are prostitutes, and I think it should be legalized. But there are certain risks that sex workers take on–primarily the increased risk of STDs–and as the lover or potential lover of someone who does sex work, SSB shares that risk. If you’re not honest with SSB about what you’re doing, you’re imposing that risk on him without his consent, and he has a right to make up his own mind about the matter. So you need to tell him. How? “I have sex with a handful of men–regulars all–to pay the bills” should cover it.
Some people are into extreme degrees of physical helplessness–physical disabilities, 24-7 bondage scenes–and people should be cautious when they get involved with one of them. If you find yourself dating someone who’s into your permanent or temporary helplessness, there are two questions you need to ask yourself: are they honest about it? And can they successfully compartmentalize their fetish?
What can you do? Call Ford dealers in your area and let them know that you won’t be buying a Ford after this. (A list of Ford dealers broken down by state can be found on Americablog: http://americablog.blogspot.com/2005/12/contact-your-local-ford-dealership.html. And while you’ve got ’em on the phone, ask them what Ford was so afraid of. The AFA’s boycott of Disney was called off after nine years because it wasn’t working. When the AFA threatened Kraft, execs there told the haters to go fuck themselves. But what did Ford do when the AFA threatened them? The “Built Ford Tough” boys collapsed. “Ford Puff” needs to hear from people who won’t buy cars from companies that cave in to right-wing hatemongers. And when your local Ford dealer tells you that he didn’t make this decision, tell him they had better yell at Ford HQ and get it reversed. Microsoft reversed itself after caving to right-wing Christian bullies. Ford can too.
